Ironclad Cycling

May your 2011 be filled with tailwinds!

I came out for exercise, gentle exercise, and to notice the scenery and to botanise.  And no sooner do I get on that accursed machine than off I go hammer and tongs; I never look to right or left, never notice a flower, never see a view – get hot, juicy, red – like a grilled chop.  Get me on that machine and I have to go.  I go scorching along the road, and cursing aloud at myself for doing it. ~H.G. Wells, The Wheels of Chance

Our Brianna Walle went down to the state of Florida for the holidays and took in some CX racing action just for kicks and to keep the engine a bit primed. Her report:

Tropical Cyclocross Race- Key Biscayne, Florida (12/18/10)
The cross community is about 1/100th  (approx) of the size of our
community in Portland. Typically, no more than 100 racers (in all
fields combined) compete in cross races and even then it’s a pretty
big deal.  I met Dario Perez, member of the Miami bike scene and of
the Mack Cycle and Fitness Race team. He’s a real cool dude who is
passionate about racing and trying to expand the cross scene in South
Florida through local community outreach. The lone wolf was
represented in IC kit since it was 80 degrees and super HOT for an
Oregonian.  I signed up for the CX 3 (equivilant to our CAT B) race
but they ended up combining 5 or so fields for a mass start. The race
started with a “sprint to your bikes” start-, lasted 30 mins, fast,
flat and with plenty of soft grassy sections, one barriers section and
a sandy stretch of sandy with run-up.  I placed 2nd overall (a kick
ass Cat ½ racer from Georgia schooled me by 10 seconds). A few folks
recognized our kit and commented on our Mockumentary teaser trailer-
we are famous in South Florida!

Bri showing Floridians what Oregonians already know…

Sand? Ocean? Shorts?

Tailwinds, cold beers, good friends, good rides! Merry Christmas!

You want some laughs? Some quality laughs? You can feed that hunger by visiting the fine folks at 21st Avenue bikes, and be sure to check out their hilarious new commercials. Check it out RIGHT HERE.

Things have gone terribly wrong in the Ironclad camp, and the wheels are coming off….but the lbs are coming on!

Are you out training? Putting on the miles? Already determining your total cookie intake over the Xmas holiday? We’re not. We’re just gaining weight, while our bikes gather dust. 2011 will not be kind if we keep going at this rate. I mean, seriously, this is just getting ridiculous. We know the weather is bad, but sports, video games, and butter-based treats seem to rule our days, while training is reduced to thinking about training. We have our work cut out for us.

Now, to give you something to do since we can’t tell you about our amazing training rides and dazzle you with pictures of our perfect asses, we instead choose to share with you the sorry sights of some of our team and our December program. Look at the pictures below, and try to guess which Ironclad rider is which. There’s a free pair of gloves in it for the winner.

Ready to play? Start guessing.

Rider #1

Rider #2

Rider #3

So, start guessing. Oh, and would you mind passing the mayo and that bag of chips? Thanks.

We appreciate the love coming in from all over the place. Well, it’s love, or maybe it’s a curious look from the corner of the internet, with one hand firmly on the butt of their gun, just in case we were to….you know….try some shit.

Thanks to remote wolf Doug O. in Atlanta for sending that on to us…

As you may or may not know, our dear Howard the Goat had a spill and snapped the cyclist’s most obvious bone structure. This resulted in the usual assortment of pain management pills and the usual home remedies, whiskey and the like.

Which of course resulted in a deep look into his record collection.

Which of course somehow incorporated beard growth.

Which of course resulted in some weird shit.

Ah, December. We’ll be out training, or resting, or family timing, or running around with a chicken mask on and wearing no pants. Until then, happy trails, and haul your holiday by bike.

another sale at a North Portland tree lot