Hyper Ventilation Upgrades Underway

As a team, we just can’t take it anymore. Sure, we won a lot of races in 2009, stood on a lot of podiums, blah blah blah. But we’re selfish power mongers so for 2010 we’ve decided no measure is too bold to undertake to ensure we win EVERY race on the schedule. And since we only take performance decreasing drugs, we’ve turned to the surgical world for the needed enhancements to be victorious.

First under the knife was Drew Willis, who had his septum removed and replaced with a V6 Twin engine, the newest toy in the non-chemical performance enhancement world. It will also provide power to his feeble brain, and it has external ports under his hairline where he can plug in and power some smaller appliances in his home. The beauty part is it runs on vegetable oil so the smells aren’t so bad and he’s not flammable.

put me in coach…..when the gas wears off…..

Ok, none of the above is true. They roto-rooted ol’ Drew’s schnozz since he’s had a lot of sinus problems. Heal up quickly, dude!