Fighting The War On Two Fronts.

The team saw itself fighting the war on two fronts today, always inadvisable from a military standpoint. A pod of mixed numbers, Willis, Trevor, Gerow, Crawfy, and our prospect Johannes took to the last Banana Belt and did pretty well for themselves, with Crawfy bringing the biggest fish into the boat with 10th in the Masters. We are sure we speak for all when we say ‘thankfully the Banana Belt series is behind us’. Shit weather for every race didn’t help and there’s nothing one can do about it, but whatever. Glad they’re gone. Bring on the Cake, and then the Blossom.

it’s incredibly pretty half way up 7 Mile Hill road….actually, the whole course is stunning.

The other half of the lot that chose to ride bicycles came on out to The Dalles to recon the Cherry Blossom’s stage 4, and the fabled 7 mile hill road. The pre-ride idealism quickly faded when talk of being punched in the dick took place. Watch this. For starters, that ride is just gorgeous. For seconds, it was windier than a fan woman after a chili cook off. I mean,…..fuck. Personally I felt like I was in an invisible mosh pit, getting hit indiscriminately from all angles, while tucked in a position normally reserved for going downhill not uphill. We’re not kidding, that was perhaps the stiffest gusts we’ve ever ridden in and we have further video to prove it. I mean, the handlebars shaking and the lateral movement – due to wind, not steering – were simple standard protocol. Upon stopping, and waiting 8 years for Dave’s fat ass, we snapped a pic for you

the vest stands straight as a board in incredible winds…

Brody, Joe, Dave, Anna, Erin, Vanessa, Kristin, Colonel, and Q took on the beast, and got the living shit kicked out of them. At first we saw stage 4  on paper and said “that seems kind of short”. Well, go ride one single loop and be thankful. Tough course, really beautiful too. This entire race will be decided by how windy it is on the last day, and who has the teammates to do the spadework, plain and simple.

Adding to the surreal difficulty of the day, one must also not rule out the crazy bucking alpaca at the top of the climb. Right side of the road. Dark fur, rotund belly, and by his actions, most likely heavily dosed on LSD. The fat bastard paused to have his photo taken, so observe, and be forewarned.

That’s not product in is hair displaying the “forward douchebag”, that’s just wind.

Seemed to be an alpaca themed time with several of the bastards making key appearances during the weekend’s ride.

Anyhow, we’ll see you all at Piece of Cake in a short week. Later!